Thursday, May 20, 2004

For All the Non-Believers

DC said...

Why does anyone care if it's really him or not? What's the point of all the nasty names?

Zmuda and Lynne took out full-page ads to remind Andy of the date, and his promise to them, right? Everything they've done in the past 20 years, everything that Andy did in the 35 years before that, what was the point of it all? What was the point of Andy Kaufman's life?

Have fun.

So maybe this isn't really him. Maybe it is. But either way, I'm still smiling.

He's having fun. And because he's having fun, I am too. I wish that you could all, for just one second, let yourselves have fun with this.

Because somewhere in this world or the next, Andy Kaufman is laughing his ass off.


DC - the non-believers are what make this country great. They accept the spoon fed liberal mass media line all the way to the bank. People wonder why I'm doing this on a blog instead of just appearing on SNL or Dateline or something. Maybe the mainstream isn't ready for me to be back yet. Maybe I don't want to be back in the Hollywood limelight, whoring myself out for some guy in a dark suit at a nameless mega-corporation.

This may not be it for some of you, but one day you will wake up and see something that you never thought was possible. The world wasn't flat like you thought it was, or you figured out the earth is not in fact the center of the universe and rotates itself about the sun, or that wearing sunscreen really is a good idea.

On that day you'll thank Andy Kaufman. Until then, I'll be seeing you at Starbucks, Wal-Mart, and various truck stops throughout the country on my national tour.

38 comments:

Dead Hero said...

Let's face it, faking yoru own death, for 20 friggin years, must be the All-Time Greatest Prank. Ever. If it was ever done, Andy could, and WOULD, be the only one to do it. So if Andy's really alive and well, God bless him. This would make him the greatest legend the comic world has ever seen. Fucking brilliant. This would be the evidence that Andy not only pushed the envelope, but he tore it to shreads, lit them on fire, and used the ashes to make his morning tea.

That being said, if this isn't him. If Zmuda is yanking our collective chain, once again. I personally think, it comes in at a close Second All-Time Greatest Prank. Your best friend and comic partner fulfills a prank you left behind 20 years prior by making the world believe that you're still alive? Fucking brilliant as well. So if Andy's not really alive, and people really do begin to believe he is, God bless Bob.

For my part, I'm going to believe. And spread the word. If Andy's alive, I'm so happy to have witnessed the All-Time Greatest Prank ,and that Andy will finally get the recognition he always deserved as the King. And if Andy's not alive, I'll happily be a small part of pulling off the Second All-Time Greatest Prank.

Whoever is responsible for this all. Thank you.

CodeWarrior said...

Cool page. Andy Kaufman rules.

just chuck. said...

i always knew you were alive. come to chicago. you're my freaking hero.

CodeWarrior said...

Great page!

Troy said...

This is so damn funny... even if you're not Andy, he'd be proud of the mind f*ck everyone's going through right now. You have the amazing insight, and your comments are profound and intriguing. Amazing the genuinely human responses that people have had isn't it? Two complete polar opposites.

Count me in on those searching for you and character co. on your stops on the tour.

LaVarious said...

Welcome back, Andy. I hope you are ready to kick comedy in its pathetic lethargic ass. There is one question that came to mind when I heard you had returned and thought it would have been hilarious...Did you have any acting parts or were you cast as an extra in "Man on the Moon"?

freegreenjello said...

honestly, i dont care if its fake or not. just the IDEA makes me laugh! GENIUS

Jacklyn Cornwell said...

I don't see why everythin thinks this is so strange. L. Ron Hubbard and a few of his cronies planned the exact same scenario, except first they would create a religion, makes lots of money, and fake their deaths so they could enjoy the fruits of their hoax. Andy Kaufman isn't the first man to plan and execute his own death -- or resurrection. The difference between fame and immortality? Whether you are remembered for a week or forever. Only time will tell whether Andy's stunt will garner him an extra 15 minutes or immortality.

Jeff said...

Well OF COURSE it's really Andy. Here's why:

If he was dead, then how could he fake his return? So to say he's faking, is to admit that he's still alive.

I believe, Andy. I believe!

(I think I'm right about this. I hope he didn't fake his own birth. That would blow a hole in my theory)

White Zero: said...

All I can say is this; Andy if it is you;BRILLIANT!
If it's not, well, we'll see...

Regards,
Geo
http://www.livejournal.com/users/mysterg/

Patrick said...

Hey, Andy! If you make it to Burbank, stop by the Starbuck's inside the Disney Channel building and I'll buy you a venti latte'. And a bagel. Oy.

Clint said...

I am so confused... Is this real or is it a hoax?

Unknown said...

hahahhaah, foools.
If he shows proof either way, the stunt is broken, showing evidence that is indeterminate is the basis of all great conspiracies.

God Bless you Andy!

Even if you're dead, I still believe this is you.
-seamus

Bill Sardell said...

Andy Kaufman would have loved (or will love) The Good Flame's FREE CD at www.thegoodflame.com. It's a mix of Andy's love of music and his love of bad-guy wrestling, and it's the FREEIST THING I'VE EVER SEEN!!!

THE SPUS said...

Exciting. I don't understand the big fuss but this will be the most amazing hoax/prank whether it's true or not!

I don't know Andy Kaufman other than from Taxi, which I watched like an addict as a child. My favorite episode has got to be when they're getting their citizenship and they get into that huge fight over what was the last movie they watched!

You should come to Kingston, Ontario in September to Queen's University. It's in Canada. I can get in on this once-in-a-lifetime event! I can even give you a tour of the university :D. And if you're just an impersonator, who needs to know besides you and me ;).

golfwidow said...

I hope this *is* a hoax, actually. It'd be a lot easier to stomach someone pulling off an outrageous spoof of this nature than to have to face the possibility of one more person in this world playing with people's emotions - like his parents and loved ones - for fun and profit.

Carlos said...

If it is you, thank you for keeping us guessing. If it isn't, thank you for keeping us guessing. If it is Ann Coulter, please drop dead, and don't leave us guessing.

Brock said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kevin said...

I have posted some of this site on my own blog...

http://kevinmccurrach.blogspot.com

If this is the real Andy, welcome back.

If this is some guy hoping for a cheap laugh,
keep it up. You're making us happy anyway.

Jeff Crowe said...

It's so OBVIOUS what's going on here. Obviously Andy, from his position of comfortable, anonymous retirement in his secret compound in Azerbaijan, has put this guy up to the whole "My death was a Hoax, and now I'm back..." thing. I'm sure he'll stage a few more false returns prior to REALLY coming back, and those of us (like me) with access to the secret Azerbaijani compound will let you all know that it's really him.

Chaz said...

Social Security Death Index Search Results
72,265,659 Records — Updated through January 2004
The most full-featured SSDI search engine on the internet.

SSN 112-36-5432 0
Last Name KAUFMAN Scanned
First Name ANDREW Scanned
Birth Date 01171949 Scanned
Death Year 1984 Scanned
Death Month 05 Scanned
Last City LOS ANGELES Scanned
Last State CA Scanned

Nothing found.

Rob Pongi said...

The return of the one and only Mr. Andy Kaufman is the best news that I have heard in, well, 20 years!


See all the latest comedy and music video clips on:

RobPongi.com

Doctor_Spankenstein said...

Andy, just give me the Wal-Mart/truck-stop tour schedule. You know...9:12PM-9:17PM May 31, Wal-Mart in Austin TX in the women's shoes section. Waving from a passing blimp directly above Bill's House of Cheese on Route 27, Westerberk, Oklahoma. That sort of thing. I'll be there.

Tripps said...

To me, it doesn't sound like the voice of Andy. But I could be wrong.




Whether it's Andy or not, this guy sure is getting alot of hits.

http://www.yummynuggets.com

Pete said...

Hey Andy, if, while you're touring Wal-Mart and Starbucks, you happen to be close to the Canadian border, cross over and give a few of our Tim Horton's a shot, eh?

G. Copeland said...

A shame so many people are so fast to point fingers, make accusations and talk so much rediculous garbage. Alive or dead what's the point of voicing your opinion if you don't even use the common sense God gave a carrot. Andy said he'd sumbit to DNA testing etc did he not? Well then all non-believeers without further adeu... I give you the proof you've all been waiting for...ladies and gentleman and jerks all around the globe....the one, the only..the LIVING Andy Kaufman.

Welcome back Andy.


Wed May 19, 9:00 AM ET


New York City, NY (PRWEB) May 19, 2004 -- Twenty years ago, on May 16, 1984, most of the world believed that we had lost a comedic legend forever. This has turned out to be what will inevitably be known as the greatest comic prank ever conceived. Andy Kaufman, by all accounts, is alive and well at age 55 and is now living in New York City on the upper west side. To his loyal supporters and fans, Andy says "sorry about faking my death," in a recent interview with ABC News at his apartment. In order to reach legendary comic status and seal his place in the history of performance art, he said it was "necessary to go away for twenty years."

Andy Kaufman's official site has been launched at:
http://andykaufmanreturns.blogspot.com/

Even though he has technically returned, Andy says that he plans to maintain his low key lifestyle that he has led for the past twenty years. He has resumed contact with friends and family. Fearing the possibility of this scenario and the potential for another hoax, Kaufman's family has contracted with independent auditors Ernst & Young to determine if this in fact the real Andy Kaufman. He has subjected himself to medical examination and submitted DNA, hair, blood and fingerprint samples to the auditors. Ernst & Young and the Kaufman family report that with a 99% probability, this is indeed the real Andy Kaufman. His mother says, "It's good to have Andy back."

G. Copeland said...

One last comment...this one's for Faker Taker....how bout some humble pie pal? No? Well then just have a coke and a smile and shut the hell up. Congratulations you just made the "Biggest Jack Asses of All Time" list. Andy - visit this guy's house and take a dump on his front lawn. Maybe since he claims he worked at the hospital at the time of your "death" he'l recognize the smell or something.

G. Copeland said...

I think I may have to retract my own statement and posting in thinkin Kaufman is actually behind this site....As a student of law and a damn good profiler....the posting of this person suggest a particlar type of demeanor or personality if you will...however those heinous pictures now posted on the main page of this site now suggest either one of two things, either the sites been hacked or we've all been had. The combination of those pictures posted and the comments and manor in which the person posting the Andy Kaufman comments, conflict. Merely posting those pictures completely takes away from the "mood" of the person posting on this website suggesting whomeever is doing this is most definitely trying to grab attention. I do't really believe anyone attempting any sort of resurrection of self in the special case of Andy Kaufman would post such extreme photos such as that,, "Andy Kaufman" himself as well as other agencies have debunked the entire yahoo report about the dna testing and the report apparently comes froma gossip tabloid newswire which is how it was submitted to yahoo to begin with. There once again is absolutely no credibility to this claim. So we decide, faker or Andy the reactionist?

Jane said...

Liberal mass media?? LIBERAL??!!! Now _that's_ unbelievable. If the mass media were "liberal" then Americans wouldn't be duped into believeing that American kids are dying to "defend our freedom" in Iraq.

Now, Andy being alive on the other hand....that I can believe.

Jennifer Newell said...

Well, I don't think I'm the only one, but... liberal media?? Whatever. I don't think so. Liberal media, my spoon-fed ass.

rhbee said...

Just dropping in to say that if there were ever a time for Andy Kaufman to return this is it.

Brophy87 said...

Nice Blog! Is this the "real" andy kaufman?

Check out my blog at http://www.brophisoft.net/blog

Henry Willard said...

Hello everyone. I'd like to confess something...when I made this blog, I figured it would be a good joke for my friends. I was wrong. It turned into a nationwide sensation. I've received death threats.

As a result, I'll tell you all the truth: I'm not Andy Kaufman. My name is Robert Jones and I am 16. Please don't be mad but I saw MAN ON THE MOON last week on TV and my dad told me how Kaufman's 20th anniversary was coming up...so I thought I'd pull a prank for my friends who saw the movie. I couldn't believe when it was posted on Yahoo!

Read andykaufmanhoax.blogspot.com for proof that I was just joking around. Sorry again!

- Bobby

Sickmind Fraud said...

Now that we will probably never hear from this Andy again, you might as well do something useful, and check out Psych Watch, or for that matter, visit a site of someone who does deserve some help and attention

David said...

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Blogger said...

COME AND CHECK MY BLOG OUT, FORGET THIS FAKE A** WANNA BE

Sebastian said...

This is to all of you including Andy...let us not be in the matrix of divide and rule. They tell us we have freedom of speech ....freedom of speech against each other, thats what every constitutional tells.

Read nonjudgementally and investigate, Condemnation without investigation is the hghest form of ignorance. We are perfect humans with multitudes of wisdom.

Let not the one the first nail that stands out be the first one to be hammered, embrace what offers love and oneness, this is the only strenght on our current existence thats not taxable. They havent discovered how to tax the feeling of infinite loving yet...no pros no cons just oneness. Abundance of information be our tool. Personal investigation be our map.

Let the heathens be one with the disciples. Thank yourself for the power you gave to yourself, the power to sit in front of a machine and say something. You are all heard. Infinite Love with the absence of all kinds of fear ( god, death, heaven or hell).
Give back to yourself what is your original birthmark, the sovereignty over yourself. Embrace each uniqueness and love infinitely. Love thyself most unconditionally. You are on top of your mind. Tell yourself what to think at all times. Smile because we are chosen to be in the most interesting times of humanity. And...Infinite Love is the only truth ...everything else are manipulated illusions...

thanks andy for this page...a number of people will see these writings

Sebastian said...

This is to all of you including Andy...let us not be in the matrix of divide and rule. They tell us we have freedom of speech ....freedom of speech against each other, thats what every constitutional tells.

Read nonjudgementally and investigate, Condemnation without investigation is the hghest form of ignorance. We are perfect humans with multitudes of wisdom.

Let not the first nail that stands out be the first one to be hammered, embrace what offers love and oneness, this is the only strenght on our current existence thats not taxable. They havent discovered how to tax the feeling of infinite loving yet...no pros no cons just oneness. Abundance of information be our tool. Personal investigation be our map.

Let the heathens be one with the disciples. Thank yourself for the power you gave to yourself, the power to sit in front of a machine and say something. You are all heard. Infinite Love with the absence of all kinds of fear ( god, death, heaven or hell).
Give back to yourself what is your original birthmark, the sovereignty over yourself. Embrace each uniqueness and love infinitely. Love thyself most unconditionally. You are on top of your mind. Tell yourself what to think at all times. Smile because we are chosen to be in the most interesting times of humanity. And...Infinite Love is the only truth ...everything else are manipulated illusions...

thanks andy for this page...a number of people will see these writings